So, you’re having a crisis. You have no idea what to do with your life or who you want to be. You’re feeling lost and you just want someone to tell you what to do next. Girl, I have so been there. The past few years of my life have been spent on a journey of
Talk about it
Tell people that you feel lost and that you’re struggling to find your purpose. In those words. Don’t beat around the bush. Don’t say you’re fine. Tell them. Go to your closest people, your ride or die, your tried tested and true tribe, and get it off your chest. It needs to be spoken because the more you say it, the more you’ll have to talk through it. There is great power in simply having to explain something. We often stumble upon answers along the way.
Take the pressure off
There are a few big misconceptions floating around about fulfillment and having a life purpose. To be frank, finding your purpose is a polished and Hollywood created notion. We don’t simply stumble across our life’s worth.
Feeling lost has a lot to do with not feeling valued, of worth, or fulfilled. It often gets confused, however, with thinking that we are not doing something special enough with our lives. Here’s the reminder to give yourself a break. Greatness comes in so many forms and the true testament to a successful life is how you have affected the lives of the people around you. Focus on finding happiness and you’ll be just fine.
Go way back
Now that I’ve reminded you to find what makes you happy, we have to figure out when the last time that was. This can be rough. You’ll need to search for the last time you were truly joyful. Now, there are a few rules to this. It has to be real,
I told you. Rough.
For me, I had to go as far back as
There has never been a better time than right now to try everything you have ever been interested in doing but talked yourself out of. Anything that made you think, that would be so neat but I’m not qualified, or I don’t have time for that etc etc. Now is the time. Try it all, even if it’s outside of your comfort zone. Even if your friends and family think you’re crazy. Even if you need to explore things on the weekends, in the evenings, take a class, make new friends, go to an event by yourself. This is really where you need to muster up the courage to go for broke.
Now, in the spirit of putting a lot of different shoes on for a try, my advice is to fail fast. Put all of yourself into it for long enough to figure out if you absolutely love it or not. Be ruthless in cutting out things that do not fit your idea of what you’re looking for. If you’re committing to finding fulfillment it’s vital that you let go of things that only make you sort of happy or that only check some of your boxes. Try hard, fail fast, move on.
This is the one that most people skip over and one that I am adamant is necessary. When you’re feeling lost, you must seek help. My suggestion is to find a great therapist or psychologist before looking for a life coach. I know that the idea of a life coach is a little less scary than to say you’ve sought professional counselling, but in my experience, feeling lost is often an outcome of a deeper issue. A true existential crisis of
Trust your gut
I think a lot of us already know, deep down somewhere inside of ourselves, exactly what we wished our life could look like. A lot of it comes down to fear. Failing, ridicule, judgement, are all deeply
So, how do you reach for what your gut is telling you that you want? Quietly. I know how strange that sounds. One way to circumvent fear is to sneak past it. Instead of making huge proclamations that you are suddenly going to be an XYZ now, you simply start being that thing. If you’re like me, and your passion is writing, you simply start writing. Little by little, in your free time, until it starts to take over more of your life, and it’s not as scary to proclaim your choice.
What if you decided to step away from average and simply live the life that will make you happy?
Time to leap
Some dreams won’t fit into the, do it in your spare time until you’re already sort of succeeding by the time you have to tell people, model. If your dream is to pick up and move to Paris for example, you will have to just do it and my only words of comfort are to remember that you were not born to be small. What if there is nothing after this? What if you don’t get another chance at life? What if you decided to step away from average and simply live the life that will make you happy?
I’m not going to lie to you and say that this is something that can be fixed by taking a chance or by simply living your childhood dream. Feeling lost is hands down the most difficult thing I’ve had to navigate through. But, from someone who has been there and is still working my way to the other side, you can make. I